Capable vs. I am

I am capable of becoming the woman who honors her body.

I am capable of becoming the woman who chooses patience and understanding when life feels complicated.

I am capable of releasing expectations of what motherhood is supposed to be and welcome what is.

I am capable of feeling confident, sexy, loving, and kind through this transition.

I am capable of communicating what I want/need/am struggling with.

I am capable of asking for help.

I am capable of trusting others I love to handle the baby with extreme care.

I am capable of continuing to love my husband and make time with him a priority.

I am capable of loving myself — purposefully shifting away from judgmental thoughts about my capabilities as a mother.

I am capable of deep, gratifying support of myself.

I am capable of being my own best friend.

I am capable of loading up and going on adventures as a family and solo with the baby.

I am capable of finding the fun, love, and laughter in each moment.

I wrote the above journal entry after becoming aware that I was already starting to create a narrative around who I was capable of being as a mother. I wanted to take back my belief system — to purposefully steer my brain towards choosing thoughts that were going to serve me moving forward.

This was my transitionary thought pattern — a safe place for me to land between my old beliefs and what I want to choose to believe. Since practicing these transitionary beliefs, I find myself ready to remove the word “capable” and simply put “I am.” The difference, though subtle, is powerful.

I am a woman who honors her body.

I am a woman who chooses patience and understanding when life feels complicated.

I am a woman who releases expectations of what motherhood is supposed to be and welcomes what is.

I am a woman who felt confident, sexy, loving, and kind through her transition into motherhood.

I am a woman who communicates what I want/need/am struggling with.

I am a woman who asks for help.

I am a woman who trusts others I love to handle the baby with extreme care.

I am a woman who has continued to love my husband and make time with him a priority.

I am a woman who loves herself — who purposefully addresses judgmental thoughts about my capabilities as a mother.

I am a woman who offers deep, gratifying support to myself.

I am a woman who is my own best friend.

I am a woman who loads up and goes on adventures with her family and solo with the baby.

I am a woman who finds the fun, love, and laughter in each moment.

When I say “I am capable of becoming…”, it creates the emotion of capability which leads me to be open to seeing all the ways in which I’m capable, as well as opens the space for me to explore without being judgmental, which further provides evidence that I am indeed capable of becoming the woman who does whatever I’ve specified.

When I say “I am…”, it creates the emotion of security and groundedness, which leads me to make, and feel confident, in myself and the decisions I make, which only further reinforces the belief that I am a woman who does those things.

As you come upon transitions in life (mine happens to be having a baby right now), stop and think about who you want to be, purposefully. What does the person you want to through this transition believe about themselves? What do they lean into? What do they stop doing? How do they operate and act?

If you don’t quite believe that you are that person yet, use the phrase “I am capable of becoming…” as a space to transition. Open yourself up to seeing that you are indeed capable of becoming the person you want to be, and when you have enough evidence, update your belief set to say “I am.”